The day began as a routine visit to see my doc at the VA.
I had no problems to speak of other than peripheral neuropathy in my hands and feet.
I got my flu shot, Doc checked me out, and, as usual gave me a lab order for some blood work.
Everything is hunkydory, you know? Relatively speaking of course.
Afterall, I still have a killer virus there is no cure for. Other than that I'm ok.
Then I hadta open my big mouth:
"Hey Doc, there is one little thing, it's kinda weird though. The last few days there is this light I keep seeing in the peripheral of my left eye. It's not a direct light into my eye but like someone shining a thin flashlight on the wall. But when I turn to see it more clearly it's not there."
"Does it hurt?" Doc asked.
"No." I replied.
"How often has this occured?" Doc asked.
"I dunno, maybe a couple dozen times," I replied.
"Let's take a look," Doc said, getting his light thingy out.
Doc shined it in my left eye then my right and back to my left. Then he did some basic coordination tests.
"Hmm, I didn't see anything but I think it would be best if you see an optometrist. I'll be back in a moment, ok?" Doc said.
"Roger that," I said.
A few minutes later Doc returned.
"I got you an appointment at 1430," he said.
"Today?" I asked, surprised.
Usually it takes at least 6 months to see an eye doctor, but it occured to me that Doc probably called in a favor to get me in this quickly.
"If you hurry you'll just make it," Doc said, smiling.
"Thanks Doc! I really appreciate it," I said, shaking his hand.
"No problem. Don't forgrt your lab work after you're done," he reminded me.
"Will do," I replied. "Take care! Good to see ya!"
I rushed to the eye clinic only to find it was under renovation. So where was it at now? I wondered, looking at my watch.
Damn, ten minutes. I went to the physical therapy building and waited as the receptionist finished talking on the phone. Finally, she hung up.
"may I help you?" she asked.
"Yes, can you tell me where the eye clinic is now located," I asked.
"Yes, it's in building 6," she replied.
"Um...where is building six?" I asked.
You would think the buildings would be numbered in order but they ain't. At least no order I can comprehend.
"Go out that door and make a left. It will across the street, 1st building you see," she said.
"Thanks," I replied, walking quickly out the door.
I made a left, and hurried to the first building I saw, which was a few minutes away.
When I got there I saw Bldg. 7 stenciled on the building.
Oh crap. Now what? I wondered. The next building was even further away. On a whim I went back the way I came and eventually saw building 6. Finally! I thought as I rushed inside. To find the police station.
What the hell? I saw an elevator nearby and took it to the second floor. If it ain't here I'm screwed.
It was here.
I breathed a sigh of relief, checked in and sat down in the waiting room. I didn't wait long. The eye doc called my name and soon had me in the eye chair.
I explained the symptoms I had been having and the doc seemed interested. That's not a good sign, I thought.
I mean, yeah it's good he was listening but bad because it might be serious.
"You ever had anything in your left eye?" Eye Doc asked.
"One of the times I had shingles it got in my eye," I explained.
"Yeah, I can see the scar tissue," he said, shining his eye light thingy in my eye.
Cool! I got scar tissue...in my eye! I thought.
"I'm going to bring the chair back so I can get a better look," he said.
The chair made a farting noise as it reclined.
"Wasn't me!" I quipped.
"Yeah, this chair is pretty old," Eye Doc said, laughing.
He put drops in my eyes to dilate them and powered up the weapon grade eye lights to H bomb intensity.
"Now, don't look directly into the light. Look over hear instead," he pointed.
A few minutes later...
"Doc?" I queried.
"Yes?" He asked.
"I couldn't help it. I looked for a brief second into the light," I replied.
"It's okay," he chuckled. "But don't do it again."
After burning my retinas the doc took me to another room with even more powerful eye burning lights to take some photos of my eye.
After around 7 photos the doc stopped.
"You have a mass behind your eye," he said. "It would explain the flashes of light you have seen."
"Good to know I ain't goin' bonkers," I said, seeing spots before my eyes. BIG spots.
"So, what now?" I asked.
"Let me get my boss and have her take a look," Eye Doc said. "Sit tight."
"No problemo," I said.
A few minutes later the Boss arrived and introduced herself.
She looked into my eyes, then we returned to the orinal room I was in where she proceeded to recline my chair.
"Brrrraaaaaappppp!" The chair said.
"That is still not me!" I protested.
The Boss chuckled and then proceeded to burn what was left of my eyes.
"You have a tumor behind your eye. We need to determine if it is benign or malignant," she said.
"I'll need to refer you to Madigan (army hospital) where some specialists will use an ultrasound on your eye to make an accurate diagnosis," she Boss continued.
"OK?" I replied.
"Most tumors are benign," Boss lady said, "but we need to know for certain, and we may need to remove it anyway if it continues to grow."
"Okay," I replied.
"Do you have any questions?" Boss lady asked.
"Yeah, if you hafta remove my eye does the VA provide coollooking patches to cover it?" I asked.
"Let's not get ahead of ourselves, but yes, I'm sure we can arrange for a cool looking patch if it comes to that," she replied smiling.
"Thanks doc and boss doc," I said. "Now I gotta go give blood before the lab closes. Thanks for the light show."
Oddly enough this has left me all fired up! Seriously! :^)
Update- Well, it looks like the soonest I can be seen is on the 18th of Dec.. And that's pretty fast, relatively speaking. The guy who svheduled it was apologetic, and I felt bad for him.
